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First – I wanted to send out a HUGE thank you and hugs to all of you who talked me down from the ledge after my cryopreservation post. Though I didn’t recognize it until later, that was a hormone-fueled meltdown that was coming for me like a bulldozer and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I drove home from work already realizing things weren’t as bad as they initially seemed, but I still couldn’t get the tears to stop streaming down my face.  I made it home, hugged Mr. A, had a good solid cry, and felt immensely better.

Since then, my attitude has improved. I’m excited that some of our blasts made it to the hatching stage in extended culture. That means there’s a great chance that the ones in my tummy made it that far as well. And just judging by the pictures of our early blastocysts, they look like they have a decent number of cells in the ICM. So I’m feeling better and looking forward to our beta on Wednesday with optimism.

I haven’t had many symptoms so far. I’ve been having some period-like cramps and mild lower back pain. I’ve also been a little tired. But those are all normal pre-period symptoms for me and, after 17 months of trying naturally, I’m intimately aware of the fact that those symptoms could mean absolutely nothing.

So, now we wait. 2 more days and we’ll know for sure if our lives are changed forever.